Switzerland, Milan, wonder and insanity

14/4 – That hotel we stayed at in Mulhouse was so sketchy. When we tried to check out, there was no one at reception. The front doors are always locked, and since both of us were out in the car park at the same time, we were forced to jump through an open window. Sometime after that, the front gate slid closed, locking all people and cars inside.

But we found a flea market in Mulhouse, and we used it to stock up on cheap fruits and other food.

At the moment we’re camped inside our car close to Meiringen, Switzerland because we couldn’t find a cheap, dog-friendly hotel or any other accommodation. But that’s not a bad thing, by any means. We found a small, dirt road close to one of the waterfalls that can be found in this valley. This is probably private property, but there are no lights or people or anything around. When there was still a bit of daylight we followed the tiny stream up the slope and got a much closer look at the waterfall, slipping on rocks and dried leaves along the way. And after we gingerly made our way back down in twilight, we laid in the grass under the stars until total darkness came and the glow of the village became the only light.

This is by far my favorite day of the trip. We’re improvising, and roughing it during this visit to the Swiss Alps. And speaking of the Alps…they send chills down my spine. We could see the faint outlines of some of the peaks a short way after Mulhouse, and they’re so jagged and tall! And after we got a full glimpse of the range after emerging from a tunnel south of Basel, the view completely distracted me from my driving duty. This mountain range looks as if bricks were smashed together and left lying in a heap, with large, rough and jagged chunks lording over the top of the pile. Though I’m from California and I grew up around mountains, I’ve never seen anything like this.

This mountain range has made me pretty much forget the steep road tax we were slapped with at the Switzerland border: 50 Euros. But after driving through Basel and the rest of the country for the next few hours, I could see why there’s such a steep toll for everyone driving: there are so many motorway tunnels that go under the mountains, and of course these roads in the Alps need to be maintained. So I understand it. And it’s such a beautiful, lush and green country I would go so far as to call it the sexiest woman I’ve seen since moving to Europe. And since the language we’ve seen so far is German, it’s my new favorite country. I’ve taught Danny some German words and phrases so far, and more words are coming back to me. They helped when we went to a lazy restaurant at the top of the cliff above this valley, where the waitress only spoke German.

And one of the reasons I’ve enjoyed this trek through the mountains is because we’ve pulled over several times to take in the view, a few of which were next to a lake just for the simple pleasure of skipping rocks. If you can’t find the time to randomly stop beside a lake with majestic mountain peaks in the background to throw rocks in the water, you’re doing vacation wrong. Just for today, Danny and I have won the contest for the best way to spend Easter break.

15/4 – Surprisingly, no one told us we couldn’t camp on that private property, even though someone actually had to pass our car on the way to work while we were sleeping. But that was a fantastic decision to camp there, with the gentle sounds of a stream and the roar of a waterfall a little farther away. That was so beautiful, and not even the smell of deer droppings (we spooked a couple last night) could mar that scene.

We got moving at the crack of dawn, and on the way we passed Brienzer See, a lake nestled between two large mountains and perhaps more clear and turquoise than Lake Tahoe. It’s almost unnaturally turquoise. I’m currently writing from a church car park in Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland. This is the most visually stunning village I’ve seen in my life. A river runs through the center, but the village is surrounded by sheer cliffs on both sides of this valley. There are a number of waterfalls here, including Staubbachfall, and to the south, a formidable snowcapped peak which might be the Aletsch Glacier. This is the Jungfrau Region, and it’s obviously a mecca for snowsports. 

Speaking of Staubbachfall, there are winding steps up a short hill and eventually a tunnel that leads to the rock face. From the rock face, people can climb a path dug into the rock to go behind the falls. All of this is open during the summer. For Danny, Rocky and I, all of this was closed. But since we were only in Lauterbrunnen for that day, we jumped the fence leading up to the hill and climbed above the tunnel, bypassing another fence attempting to keep people out. By doing this we were able to get close to the falls and snap some incredible pictures. 

There is a graveyard in Lauterbrunnen, but every grave is maintained with its own flower/shrub box. It appears as if the space is worked on every day. I've never seen that kind of thing before. It makes a graveyard seem brighter and a bit more positive.

We drove our way up into the higher parts of the Alps while trying to get into Italy. On Highway 11 from Gadmen, we were unable to go any farther due to a gate blocking the road over the pass. On this road we were surrounded by several peaks, including Radlefshorn, Giglistock and Wendenstock. The views are incredible, but these mountains and peaks are savage beasts. On a perfectly warm and clear day like today, it's difficult to navigate those steep and windy roads up the pass. In the middle of winter, I can tell those mountains can and will squash you like a tiny insect that lands on your computer screen. Danny was driving that road, and I could tell he was uncomfortable driving up there, especially with the trap otherwise known as our car.

Today we’ll pass through the border to Italy; we’re very close as it is. But I don’t know how Italy will be able to compare to what I’ve seen in the Alps of Switzerland (in fact, England shouldn’t even be mentioned in the same sentence as Switzerland).

Later…

About an hour before we crossed the southern border into Italy, we noticed how Switzerland was changing. The towns looked different and the first language was turning into Italian. It was gradually becoming more smoggy as well. 

Our trip into Milan started off fine. We stopped in a local cafe to find a hotel, and the people who worked there were genuinely trying to help us find something. They were very friendly and left a great impression. We were speaking English, Spanish and Italian. But that's where the good vibes ended and our misery began. To make a long story short:

Fuck Milan traffic. 

I hate the city because of it. I wasn't driving, but I was losing my bloody mind trying to navigate that overly congested maze in the city center; I can only imagine what was going through Danny's mind behind the wheel. Traffic in San Francisco is difficult. It's bad in London. In Milan, it's offensive. It's every man for himself. Cyclists, scooters and motorcycles ride on lines, splitting traffic. Taxis use the shoulder. Two lanes somehow become four. People walk out in front of you without even looking. Traffic stops for minutes on end. Aggressiveness is the name of the game. I was coming unhinged because we couldn't find a way out of that mess. Eventually I was yelling in despair, telling motorcyclists to fuck off. My heart rate rose. I felt stress like I rarely do. And this:

"How the fuck to I get out of here?!"

Times like this had Danny and I sniping at each other. But I have to give him credit; he kept his cool and the car scuff-free. I was glad to be out of Milan, but we'll be back tomorrow. We're currently staying in a hotel in the hills of Magreglio, more than 50 kilometers from Milan. See, Milan was so awful it had us running for the hills! I actually like this village much more; it's quiet and slower. We also had some pizza. Mine had tomato sauce, mozzarella and salmon. Excellent. We'll stay here a couple of days and then head to Genoa, Italy and eventually Monaco and Nice in the south of France. 

This adventure is a whirlwind of sights, experiences and feelings. Today alone has felt much longer than just a day, and it's shocking to realize we've only been at it since Saturday. This is a trip I'll remember forever, but like with England, it's not "if" I ever do a roadtrip like this again, but "when."

So now, I'll get ready for bed, with Rocky snuggled up next to me snoring.